I love that he apparently got the job because he looked so pathetic that children truly believed he would be unable to solve puzzles created by a cartoon dog without their assistance.
kids really said “i can fix him”
Last night I had a dream I woke up to find that my house had been turned into a Smart House with every wall being a digital screen including the roof so I could see it even laying on bed and the Siri voice said “Don’t worry. You are perfectly safe in your Apple Smart Home™️” knowing I have a BIG phobia of intruders especially at night and it continued with “Let’s explore the neighborhood from the comfort of your home” so it opened google maps and accidentally zoomed past a shitty jpeg of the girl from The Ring standing outside my house and it said “ignore that”. woke up laughing
Cat jumps on imam leading Ramadan prayers in Algeria
A live broadcast captured the moment a cat jumped on an imam, who was leading a nightly Ramadan prayer in Bordj Bou Arreridj, Algeria.
Imam Walid Mehsas was praying Taraweeh, a nightly prayer occurring every evening during the month of Ramadan, when the cat jumped on him and climbed on his shoulders.
i dont think you guys know how much this blew up in Arab/Muslim communities, its at a point now where people are drawing this man and its kinda like a wholesome meme
good that's what I dearly hoped to know
we're all so lucky that a cat can be orange. that's such an incredible color for a cat to be
And in these next 50 years you will eat so many delicious meals, laugh so many times with so many people you love, shout and scream and sing and cry and smile so hard your face hurts. And you will see such beautiful sunsets and feel fresh cold air on your face and feel warm and safe wrapped up in your favourite winter coat.
I wrap this blessing around you like a shroud, so that no ill can find you, and every warmth is held close
banger tweet from mr. goats this afternoon
Cocaine Bear is so fucking funny because it’s one of those movies where everyone is in a different genre. Some of them are in a crime movie, some are in a heartwarming drama about friendship, fatherhood, and grief, some are in a romantic comedy, some of them are in an action movie about a badass milf saving her kid. But none of them realize they are actually in the bear’s movie. And the bear’s movie is about. Cocaine. And doing cocaine. And killing people. But mostly cocaine.
How. Do you get the ideas from brain to word doc. What kind of cord do I need
spinal
Big stretch
before: GOD DAMN MOTHERFUCK PIECE OF SHIT
after: hello mommy 🥺 could you pretty please help me with this 🥺 it’s me your baby boy
That face says it all
This is how the James Web telescope works
A million little eyes staring into the cosmos to help paint a picture of our place in the universe.
That's an angel
i think about this one so fucking often i had to clip it
that was like watching someone very skillfully assembling a stained-glass window just to watch someone else dropkick it
People sing Brennan Lee Mulligan’s praises back and forth but his collaborators are all deeply skilled improvisors as well, Zac Oyama has an utterly killer sense of comedic timing.
This is the way you’re supposed to do pranks!
I try SO hard not to make faces when I hear someone around me say wild shit but I just can’t stop myself
Choose your fighter
This is the funniest shit
Thank you so much for sharing